Pre-kid day at the beach:
Noon: wake up, have a bloody mary
12:30-6pm: Hit the beach, drink, play catch and or drinking games, tan one side 30 min., swim, tan other side 30 min., swim, repeat rest of the afternoon. Go home and get ready to go out with a nice golden tan all over your body.
Beach with kid:
6 a.m.-noon: feed baby, play, nap, feed baby, play, nap, vacuum and pick up house, mow the lawn.
noon-2:00-get together everything needed for beach and baby, feed baby, play, nap.
2:00-2:30 Finally at beach....feed baby hunched under an umbrella, because you forgot chairs.
2:30-2:40 play catch with husband, because he has talked about it all morning, while baby hangs out on blanket staring at sand.
2:40-baby starts crying so take him to water to put his feet in.
2:42-baby starts crying
2:45-put baby back in car seat to relax and hopefully nap...
2:45 and 30 sec-baby starts screaming
2:50-3:15 walk baby around under shade tree to try and calm down...switching off with husband so you can jump in the water for 2 seconds to cool off.
3:15-3:45-rock baby under umbrella hunched over because you forgot the %$#^ chairs!!
3:45-3:55-baby falls asleep and you attempt to put him back in his car seat.
3:55-4:00-baby wakes up and starts screaming, pour out your warm beer you had 2 sips from. Pack everything up and go home.
Put the kid down for a nap, and go and play corn hole in the back yard with husband with a nice golden tan on your shins.